hoho. got back geog, english, chem.
geog- 65. B3
english- 58. C5!!! wah piang, my english is pathetic!
chem- 60. B4.



also i assumed my emaths will get a1.
so in total i calculated my L1R5. it was. sixteen.

16.


ok, i hope. after moderation, it can become a 12 or 13.
but like not very possible. go NY or AJ?


BLUR. someone advise me.





yep, like what i have said, today is doom's day!
haha, got back results for physics and chem and english.
haish. hahahhaa.


physics overall 57 - c5
chem practical 29/48
english paper 1 compre 14/25
haish, with such results, how to go NYJC, or AJC. or SAJC?
mayb IJC is a good choice bahs..
haha


tml will have a greater doom's day.
getting amaths and the rest of chem papers back bahs..
everything is bad.
NO MORE FIRST 3 MONTHS!

nevertheless, its been 1 month and 5 days since i last saw him. yep, he was wishing. but now i wish i can see him sia. HA!

actually no, ha, i dunno. hahhaa, today i sing till very shuang in school. hahaha. I LOVE TO SING! wahahahha.. jiayous, we must not be disheartened of our results! jiayous! haish, although very sad. but haiya, sad also no use, jiayous bah!

by the way, i am alright. just needed a way to show my unhappiness that i encountered today.
ha, don't worry!
i will still be me tomorrow!


To c.i :


it's not that everytime i dun wanna try to ask for permission to wherever u all suggested to go. its not as if i don't wanna go, it's not that i am afraid to try.
it's because I HATE TO TRY!
Bcos, i know i will not succeed. i remember barbara saying, "aim high and fall hard".
although i don't live by her code. Ha! but i do agree with it, don't you think so?
ou see, how many times did u all ask me to try, how many times did i succeed?
NONE! I am not blaming anyone. but you know what,
having you all as my friends, i really appreciate it alot.
that day, in the gallery, meihui said something which actually moved me : " angmoh ah, wo men bu hui hai ni de"
ha. maybe to you all, it doesn't mean much.
but you noe to me, i know that i still have c.i to count on even if i am left with nothing..
and ya, today we had an outing to pasir ris park...
i pushed it away at first when they asked me to go..
however kexin told me about flying kites, hey it may sound childish...
but i never in my life fly a kite before, i want to noe how it feels like..
you called me, i only managed to say " can i go..." and you gave a definite NO!
i haven even finished my sentence...
you don't even know where i wanted to go, and what i am going to do and you turn me down.
then u just asked me to pass the phone to father. and then bam, that's all.
like hello, prelims are OVER!. but u want me to start studying for o' levels.
which freak will start??
according to bao, there still 6 weeks before o's!
wait till at least i get back prelims result first!


then you came home railing.
at first i wan a bit angry that you didn't approved, but my anger faded off so soon.
i didn't even have the chance to show you any temper.


and yar, meihui that day at mac say, maybe one day i would flare up doing all the housework and burn the house down. i replied meihui that i won't, yes maybe i won't burn the house down. but i may run away. run away from this house that doesn't really seemed like one.
but i hoped i can control, control till i am old enough. yar old enough. when will that be?
by then. i would definitely run away. i really wanted to run out just now.


prelims ended on wed. before that everyday i was so troubled abt the preparation of coach birthday. at least that day, we had a nice day. then thurs, watch movie and play at kex house. den sat i went my ah ma house and today i stayed at home. and my mother said i had enough of playing already! ha. what a joke. and she told me not to go too far.


why did i study so hard for my prelims? why?
did you all not know that its because my other cousins are so clever that i am forced to produced as good results as them? yar, you said: do you best can already. but that's on the surface. then why is it so that you sometimes scold me for not doing good enough. you still compare me with my classmates. yar, i know they are clever, but for you and for myself i already did my best. howvere i noe my results will never reach your expectations.. because it will also not meet mine.
don't you think i deserved more break than what you think?? i shalll give myself a break.
and ya, today. i really wondered why i study so hard for my prelims. i feel like giving up on everything. is it marks that matters? so what if i got good grades but i don't even have the freedom to go out with my friends. i noe i can't do well too, but i studied so hard, i already did what i should do, then what about the time that i lost to accompany my friends when i was studying so hard?


and yar, i must say that i don't agree with what you all said. even if she dun let me go out and all that i still respect her. you know why, i never said out before, but during that time when i was down with dengue, my mother was with me all day, in teh night she wake up and sit by my side to check my temperature and to change the towel on my forehead. when i was in hospital, no matter how busy. each day she came twice. all this, really make me really wanna thank her.
but i already tried my best not to make her angry already, but most of the time is not i make her angry. is just her limit is just too confined, too small. she seemed to be a bubble, so easily burst. i agree that i can ren alot, but today i just cant. she's just too much.


however, in the paragraphs above, i am angry not because she don't let me go out with you all today. its because of the quarrel i had with her because she dun let me go out today. because she made me feel as if all i should do is to study and help her tidy the house. she made me feel as if she is not in the wrong when i strongly believe is her fault. and last of all, her unreasonable. i really can't stand it. she made me feel rah, i dunno the feeling is really bad.
but i wanna say, all the bad feelings are gone now. after i have written some out.
still got alot, but ha, STM, forget liaoz.
i got alot to say.. but aiya, nothing also la..
now already feel SO MUCH SO MUCH better.


tml i will already fine after a sleep.
thanks for reading. ha, its very long i noe. but that's the anger that i wan to vent out.


tml is monday, maybe getting back prelims results.
i dun wanna all my hardwork go to waste.
please, let me enter NYJC.
jiayous everyone, good luck!


today is a very important day...
ha, OUR COACH BITHDAY! haha, 40th birthday.
ha, we make a birthday cake for him!
ha, its nice and quite nice to eat. its already very good for us as we are first timers!
hahaha...

ha, the letters fall off. but ha! nice right??

hahhaa, here are some photos of today!!

it started out to be liddat. haha, become that end product very amazing right? hahahha. but we made it!

ha, that's us! ha, that's coach in tthe middle. the very great man! hahah you see me with a orange paper thing on my shirt? ahha, let u see what it is...

ha, drawn by lovely lor.. hahaa. not bad hor. hahha!

ha, thats us, sec 3 and 4. most of b girls are here all of us showing either 4 or 0, cos today coach FORTY years old. hahhahha.

ha, the sec4s and coach..

ha, that's what i love about zhss bball team. the togetherness and their company! thanks!

the great news for today is that prelims are over!!.
Ha, going to watch little man with kexin tml. Nc16 though, hope can watch lor. hahaha.
yea, that's all. good luck to all taking their end of year advanced paper this friday! good luck and take care.

ADRIANO. gd luck.